Weekend Update

I had a pretty eventful weekend. My cousin, Catrina invited me to a Mavericks game (ice hockey) with herself and her sons on Friday night. The game was a lot of fun to watch; not very many fights, but the ones that did break out were pretty good. It was great to be able to spend time her. She and I haven't spent a whole lot of time together in a very long time. It has been almost six years actually. Saturday, I had my family's "Redneck Thanksgiving" which was also fun. I got to shoot a gun (which I probably don't need to do again!) and I saw Brody and Andrew, which was nice. Andrew didn't have too much to say, which I suppose is understandable. He'll get over things eventually...I'm really glad that I got to see my nephew. I miss him so much; Sadie too, but that's a whole different situation. Saturday night was Shaun and Chuck's double birthday party. I got to meet more of Shaun's friends whom he rarely gets to see either because they are always busy or they live out of town. It was nice to get to know them better. All of them said that Shaun has been telling them all kinds of wonderful things about me, which is great :) I of course, got drunk and ended up wrestling UFC style with Chuck. I got him in two pretty amazing sleeper holds. Shaun tried to get me in one, and I rolled him onto the floor in his kitchen to get myself out of it. He fared much better than Chuck. By the time it was all said and done, I ended up kicking Chuck in the face, and the second time, the poor guy got punched in the face by me. The only reason he won that one was because he tried to squeeze my stomach into my throat, and I couldn't get out of the hold. It vaguely reminded me of a hulk hands situation with Andrea, back in like 2006 or something! Fun times.

Today was pretty mellow. I picked up Maggie from C's mom's house, had a quick lunch and then napped with the pup. When I got up, I went back to Shaun's and watched the Chiefs game then Knocked Up with him and Heather, while we ate Chinese food. It's funny; I feel more at home with him there than I do at my own apartment. I guess that's not funny, really...I see myself with him for the long haul, so it would make sense that he feels like "home" to me. I never want to leave him at the end of the night. Tonight was no exception...here it is, 1 am in the morning, and I only got home about half an hour ago. I stay as long as I can every time, and the goodbyes take forever. He and I decided tonight that we are not going to do Christmas presents. Neither of us really need anything, and both of us have said previously that we would rather not buy gifts if we don't have to. I like being able to get him presents whenever I feel like it. This isn't to say that maybe next year, when we've been together longer, we might get each other something small. Just not this year.

That's it for my weekend update. Thanks for reading. Peace and love to you all :)

Time for an update

I finally heard back from the Peace Corps! My "thanks, but no thanks" letter came in the mail last week. Am I disappointed? No. I am glad that I made the attempt to join, and I realized going in that my lack of schooling may have hindered me from being seriously considered. I have a lot on my plate for this coming year anyway. I signed up for college (finally), and will be taking an accelerated math and english course during the first semester, then moving into more studies during the second semester. I'm pretty excited to get started. I will say, Shaun is happy that I will be staying state-side. The two of us are making plans to travel, and are very excited to get started. We will be going to Sanibel Island in Florida in June with his family, and then in November of next year we will travel to Italy for a romantic (and food filled) vacation. I am looking forward to seeing Rome and Venice with a man as amazing as he is. I couldn't ask for a better partner in life (minus my HSL of course).

It's been such a short amount of time, but both of us know already in our hearts that this is it. We have so much in common and are so happy together. I miss him the moment I leave him, and can't wait to get to see him again. I have to actively stop myself from thinking about him so that I can get work done. Shaun is also the first man (since high school) that I have had absolutely ZERO doubts about as far as fidelity, honesty...anything. I trust him 110% and I love that I can be myself around him. I'm not holding anything back, and it feels truly liberating, exhilarating, amazing...you get the picture. The thought of spending the rest of my life with this man just seems natural and good. I thank God every day for showing me such a truly fantastic man.

In other news, since I will be so busy with school, and with the fact that I am rarely home as it is now...C will be taking Maggie to live with him. It's the best case scenario I believe. I will still get to see her frequently, and she will have a better home life. I feel awful that she spends so much time alone. It makes me feel guilty; like I am a bad pet-mommy. I want her to be happy and healthy (emotionally), so I felt it was best to seek another home out for her. C couldn't bear the thought of her going to a stranger, so he offered to take her. I'm grateful for that; I couldn't imagine her being away from me like that. I have had Maggie since she was three weeks old. C and I are the only owners she has ever known. I love her so much, and will miss her being away but I know that she will be happier in the long run. Next month, Maggie will reside in a different place. That's going to be tough to swallow for me.

I believe that is all the news I have for tonight. Peace and love to you all!

Halloween...and stuff :)

I have to say-this Halloween was pretty spectacular. Shaun and I carved pumpkins together, which was so much fun! He and I laughed the entire time we were carving them. The pumpkins were "drunk" and one of them was puking. While not original, it was hilarious! Saturday evening, Shaun, Heather (his sister) and I all went out for Halloween parties. There were some pretty interesting costumes. Our friend Steve was dressed as the guy from 300, and he made sure that he wore as little clothing as possible-it was literally a cape, sandals and this little pair of fake leather speedos (that he sewed himself!) Our friend Chuck went all out and dressed as Pinhead from some horror movie....I always forget the name! He looked awesome!

Sunday was a pretty huge day-I met Shaun's family (well, some of them). I know how important his mom is to him, so meeting her was something that I have been very excited to do. She was very funny, and very nice. I liked everyone I met and I got along very naturally with them (which is generally the case). I am so glad that he cares enough about me to where he wants me around his family. That says a lot about our relationship and how much value he puts into me. I'm also really glad that we haven't rushed right into dating and then meeting the family (back to back). Everything about this just felt right; then again, everything about Shaun feels right. He's amazing.

On an unrelated note, I received a phone call from the Peace Corps at work-they were checking to see if I received my letter yet, and if not, to call them back. I did return their phone call and advised that I have in fact not received my letter and asked them to re-send it to me. At this point, I'm simply curious to see what they have to say. I know that I want to help people-it's something I feel I need to do with my life...I'm just starting to doubt if I was meant to do the PC. Could it be a sign that this is not my path?

50 things

Initially, I was going to make this a post on my private journal, so only I could see it. I started thinking, "why shouldn't my friends be able to see the things that I like about myself?" I've been working really hard this year at becoming a more emotionally healthy person; I've been going through therapy, finally took the initiative to get help about my anxiety problems, ended a relationship that simply lasted too long...I know that I have a lot of people routing for me to succeed in just about everything that I do, so I feel like I kind of owe it to everyone to brag a little about myself :) So here it is...50 things I like about myself:

1) my eyes-this is a no-brainer. I have always loved the way my eye color changes from a hazel to beautiful green, depending on my mood. I also love the brown speck in my right eye!
2) my sense of humor
3) I love my devotion to the people I love
4) I love my drive to help people (kind of stole this from Andrea, but it's true.)
5) my impeccable taste in heels
6) I love the fact that I haven't gained a ton of weight since high school, and can still eat pretty much anything I want!
7) I love my finger-toes. Yep, it's true!
8) I love how much I genuinely care for others-even if it means that I get walked all over, or they don't appreciate it. Someday, they will get it.
9) I love the fact that I can do anything I set my mind to (half marathon)
10) my love for nerdy, educational television
11) I love the fact that I know how to cook, and I enjoy cooking for others :)
12) I love my weird taste in food (peanut butter and pickles)....It helps keep me interesting
13) my endless need to understand the meaning behind my dreams.
14) I love that I have made it my mission to have a closer relationship with God-without sticking with a religion I don't agree with.
15) along with the last one, I like that I write out my prayers in a little journal I keep in my purse. I like to pause at work or whenever I feel I have something to say. Usually it's to give thanks for people or things in my life. Sometimes it's a prayer to help me continue to be the woman I want to be.
16) I love that I am open-minded and accepting of everyone. I truly believe that everyone is equal, no matter what their race, sexual orientation or religion and we should all have the same rights and liberties. This includes marriage!
17) I love the little freckle on my left ring finger
18) my smile
19) the length of my eyelashes
20) I love that with all the things that have happened in my life (dealing with death, struggles with having a consistently good relationship with my mom, etc), I have managed to make it out in relatively good shape.
21) I love that I was able to quickly realize after a difficult breakup that he was never right for me, and was able to move on to someone so much better suited for me.
22) I love that I keep my heart open for others
23) I love that I'm a giver
24) my love for animals-especially Maynard and Maggie
25) my love for art/culture
26) my brilliant personality :)
27) I love that I kept so many notes from friends in high school-it's fun to go back through them and have a good laugh.
28) my love for writing-even if I am not really that talented a writer, it's fun to do. I once had a teacher in high school who encouraged me to continue to write.
29) my multi-tasking abilities. It helps me stay productive at work!
30) work related...I love that I was rated the top supervisor in the center. I like what I do, and I am always trying to do better.
31) I love my tattoo...while this is an object, it's permanently on my body, and I picked it. I feel like it's a great expression of who I am.
32) I love the fact that I don't cry during all the sappy, chick flick movies.
33) my nerdy love of astrology...I'm not afraid to admit it either!
34) my creativity
35) I love the fact that I can still be a girly-girl and not be afraid to put a worm on a hook!
36) my love of science and space
37) I'm intelligent.
38) I'm weird
39) I'm fun to be around
40) I'm an excellent snuggler
41) I'm honest
42) I'm faithful-I guess this kind of piggybacks off of the devotion. I'm very devoted and caring, and I will never EVER cheat on a partner.
43) I love my desire to travel and see things
44) my love for the outdoors
45) I'm not going to lie...I'm a big fan of my "death stare". People know that I'm not one to be messed with when they get that look...
46) I'll fight for what is right
47) I'm an excellent back rubber
48) I am an expert at looking busy, when I'm clearly just messing around
49) I never give up on people
50) I love that I also never give up on myself.

And there....while some of them are pretty simple, 50 things are 50 things, and I'm proud to say that I am finally a fan of ME. As Andrea would say, "It's about time!"

Vacation

Shaun and I finally made a decision on where we want to go for our first out of country trip. We have been discussing for a few weeks the possibility of doing a European vacation, but there are so many places to see! Yesterday, he and I had e-mailed back and forth on possibly going to Greece, and he showed me this marathon that they do in Athens every year. They also have a 10k race, which he said he wouldn't mind training for. I did sign up to get details for next year's race, however the place that he and I ended up choosing this time around was Italy. It was really a no-brainer. We both really want to visit and see the history of the country, eat delicious food and just enjoy being together. We still need to figure out when we will go next year, but still. Italy! Molto!!

I do want to do the run in Athens at some point. Not sure if I would make that my first marathon or not...we'll just have to see. Maybe 2012?

Half Marathon

I'm proud to say that I finished my first half marathon! Andrea came up from Houston on Friday to run with me. I must say first-she's a great motivator. That crazy lady was upbeat and happy the whole thirteen miles. I, on the otherhand, was hating life about four miles in. I had a very low level of personal motivation or energy for most of the race. We probably should have had breakfast before running such a long distance. Nonetheless, I finished the race with my best friend on my arm and it felt amazing. I also had some great support there. Shaun and my friend Chuck came to watch us run as well as Andrea's mom and dad. My mom and sister did come out, but they were a little too early, and left before I was able to finish the race. I'm glad that they at least made the attempt. Shaun was very sweet. He had a dozen red roses for me as well as a card and a gift card for a full body massage! I can't sing his praises enough; not because he got me flowers and a present, but because he is such a wonderful man. It's so refreshing to be with someone who is as genuinely warm and caring and unselfish as Shaun is. He lets the world know he's with me, which is something I haven't ever had before. I've always been the one to give all of myself in a relationship, and now it's an equal effort. I appreciate everything he does. It's great.

On another note-still no word from Peace Corps in my mailbox. Is this a sign that I was really not supposed to join? It makes me wonder. I check the mail every day, and nothing. Zip, zero, zilch. I know that in my heart, it is something that I would love the opportunity to do. I know that I would have the chance to really provide help to people who need it. A lot of people are asking if I can just stay local and still help. Yes, and I do that already. I feel that the Peace Corps will give me something that local organizations just don't provide, which is the ability to get out of my comfort zone and make an impact on a community with very limited resources. I guess I just have to see what happens. I do pray to God that the things happening in my life are happening for the right reasons. I feel a lot closer to Him than I have in many years, so I trust that He knows what is best for me. I'm also happy to report that I am loving myself a lot more than I used to as well. This is huge for me. I still need to write my "list"...the 50 things that I love about myself. If you don't remember this, please go back to my August posts, and take a look at the LEARN process. I made a commitment to myself that I would do this, and I will. I just haven't..yet.

The Weekend Update

This weekend has been a good (and very busy) one! Friday night, my friend Chuck and I went to dinner and a movie. We saw Wall Street-Money Never Sleeps. I liked the movie a lot. I haven't seen the first Wall Street yet, so I'll make sure to check that out asap. After the movie, he and I went out to our friend Adam Rogers' for a small bon-fire. It was really nice to be able to just sit and relax with friends. Saturday, Shaun and I went to the Nelson-Atkins and enjoyed art and photography. I'm so glad that he likes cultural things, as I could never convince my ex to go with me. While we were there, Shaun told me that he had an idea for lunch; Thai place! It was delicious (as always). I then went home to spend some time with Maggie, and pack an overnight bag. Shaun and I then went to a housewarming party, and I met some good friends of his. It was a really great time; I also had the best mini cupcakes on the face of the planet. I plan to get them for Shaun and Chuck's dual birthday party next month. Sunday, I slept in and then met up with Chuck to help put my bed back together. Once that was done, I took a trip out to Lawrence to visit my very dear friend, Mayabi. We had mexican and then some ice cream and walked around downtown. He then showed me the pharmacy building at KU (I still like MU better), and I went home.

I really enjoyed meeting Shaun's friends. Most of us had gone to high school together, but I never knew. What is even more funny is that I actually graduated with one, and never even knew him. We discussed the 10 year reunion, and how disappointing it turned out (he didn't even go). I have to say that I really just enjoy Shaun. He makes me happy every single day. I know that our relationship is still new, but I really can't see him changing his personality as the relationship goes on. Who he is now is who he will always be. I'm so excited for Friday. My best friend comes in town for the half marathon, and she finally gets to meet Shaun. Now if only Journey and Randa could hurry up and get here, he would have met all of my best girlfriends, with the exception of Julie.